Friday, May 27, 2011

New Release from Glade Plug-Ins

Glade spokesperson Geoffrey Archer announced Friday the arrival of the newest member of the S&C Johnson and Son Company. Due to the popularity of the brand’s fresh oil scent releasing devices, as well as high demand for energy efficient products, the latest addition comes in the form of Glade Plug-In Suppository Fresheners.

The concept behind the device is quite simple, explains Archer, “The capsule is a small oil infused system that dissolves when inserted into the rectum.”

Geoffrey suffers from Restless Flatulation Syndrome, and decided he could utilize the company’s products in a way to help both himself and others with similar unfortunate circumstances.

The device, once inserted, stores its fragrance until the tremendous moment of breaking wind. Avid consumer of Glade, Melinda Ways, applauded the efforts. “My husband used to not even want to sleep in the same bed with me. Now, whenever the room starts to get a little stale, he’ll beg me to cut another one!”

Plug-Ins come in various scents such as Lilac, Morning Dew, and Vanilla. For the more masculine shoppers, New Car and Fresh Pine will also be available.

Says Geoffrey, “We’d like to make this a year-round thing, and as such we’ll also be releasing a holiday line: Pumpkin Pie, Apple Cinnamon, Gingerbread. We like to keep things seasonal.”

Johnson and Son is thrilled to be taking part in the modern natural gas powered revolution.

Archer closed his speech with the famous words: “Plug it in, plug it in.”

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